3 Tips for Helping Your Partner After a Loss
Everyone will experience the loss of a loved one at some point in their life. Studies show that grief is a natural part of loss and when permitted, it helps the person cope and heal naturally and in a healthy way.
However, according to a study conducted by Stanford University, recovering from loss requires more than going through the process of grief. Perhaps love and support from friends and family is the most helpful way to recover. This is especially true for partners.
The study from Stanford University also shows that men and women facing a loss turn to their partners and spouses first. The support they get from them can go a long way in their recovery.
Here are some ways partners can help each other recover from a devastating loss:
Human beings naturally tend to focus on the negatives. When someone faces the loss of a loved one, their natural inclination can be to dwell on the negative feelings and how their lives will never be the same.
As their partner, your first instinct might be to jump in with all the positives in their life and try to convince them that they have other things in life to be grateful for. However, this minimizes their feelings and might make your partner feel like you aren’t acknowledging what they are going through.
That is why it is important to validate their feelings of the loss and the pain. Let them know you are listening to what they are saying and that you are there for them whenever they need to talk and feel cared for.
Recognize Your Limitations
Seeing your partner in pain might propel you to try and find ways to “fix” what they are going through. However, you need to understand that there are certain things that you can not fix as their emotions need to be processed by them with time. As much as you can support them in many other ways, there are limits to how much you can help with and trying to do too much might backfire.
Of course it is normal to want to make everything feel alright for them. But if you offer more than what you can actually do for them, you may find yourself unable to keep your promises, and eventually breed resentment towards you, even though you were very well intentioned.
If you’ve been in the relationship for a long time, you probably know your partner quite well. You must be aware of the things that trigger stress and feelings of sadness for them. Help them avoid those triggers by running an “interference” for them. For example, take the calls of condolences and any other obligations, which might enhance the feelings of loss for them.
Help take their mind off the heavy stuff for a while and give their mind and body time to heal by engaging them with other activities. However, make sure you don’t deny them their space or force them into doing something they are not yet ready for.
KikuPal — The Ultimate Grief Support Platform
While your partner grieves you can help by taking over some of their responsibilities giving them more time to heal. KikuPal can provide you and them the ultimate grief and loss support.
Our online crowdfunding site allows you to create an account for your loved one and gift practical services to help them through their healing journey. Services include meal delivery, housecleaning, transportation, and more. You can also share the account with other people so they can contribute.